Cause & Effect

Everything in life has a beginning and an end. The end is, in most cases, determined by the beginning. In all of our lives we have had good and bad relationships and/or experiences and most of the time we will pass judgment on a situation or person without fully examining what made them who they are. Now this in no way justifies ignorance or deception but it just gives us a little insight in how to better deal with these situations. How many times have you been in a relationship where you spend more time dealing with someone's past hangups than building a solid foundation for your present space. Each of us has baggage because none of us comes from a perfect background, but if we understand that for every effect there is a cause. If a woman was not raised to respect and love herself, she will always search for validation in others. Now this cause usually ends up with that woman choosing the wrong man which in turn perpetuates a series of bad decisions that will go on until she decides to deal with the initial cause which is her not loving herself. By the same token, if a man was not taught how to be responsible and respectful he then goes on to make bad decisions. He may even be blessed with the right woman but if he never learned how to treat a woman or how to be a real man he will only destroy anything and anyone he comes in contact with. And let us not forget all of the cultural things we have to deal with. African Americans in particular still suffer from the "Wille Lynch Syndrome" which has us programed for failure in every aspect of our being especially in relationships. The first step to recovering is to at least recognize it for what it is, BRAINWASHING. When we see it we can begin to change it. So where do you stand in the cycle? It's all truly cause & effect but we must understand that we are in control of what and who we are. We may not have come from the best but we can all create new causes to get to our desired effects.


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